Home support -we got it!!

For five years we have talked about someone coming to our house to help us with Mia. Many weekends if not all we've said to each other god home help be great now. For five years we've fought for our daughter to have her right to help her live with her condition. And help for us. Before I started this blog I had fought for years and was tired and we had lost our faith in the system. When I decided to start writing this it was like I had the strength to fight again. I emailed the HSE everyday different people all in the one department. I was done playing nice and having my daughter just be a name on the waiting list. I was done trying to juggle everything and being constantly overwhelmed
.last week I got a phone call to tell me that Mia had been granted 4 hours home support. I was shocked and thought it was too good to be true. I was so happy for her. Finally someone was realising what she needed. I met with the autism nurse and Mia's new home worker on Wednesday. I was nervous. We'd fought so long and I was anxious about how the meeting would go. Brenda the home worker was nervous too that kept my mind at ease. She will come two days a week, two hours each day. She'd look after Mia while I could spend time with Ava and jack. All sounded great in theory. Felt positive about securing help and proud of ourselves for fighting.
 Today was Brenda's first day. I wad quite calm about her coming. A tiny part of my brain was thinking am I a shit mother now for taking help? But then the grown up side of me and my heart told me no I'm not. I'm a good mother for taking help. Sometimes we all need help and I never ask for it. More important I've excepted Mia needs help I CAN'T always give. sometimes you have to accept you can't do everything.
I've tried so hard to be all the things she needs my own health ahas suffered. Mia was shy when Brenda came today. She sat with her watching tv and I liked her straight away she didn't push Mia to talk or even look at her. She just sat with her watching her programmes. After ten mins Ava decided to fill her in on everything while jack hung out of me all shy. Mia slowly came around and they went out the back. Brenda asked Mia did she want to walk lexi around the garden with her Mia was thrilled. They brought lexi for a walk and I watched my little girl who so many people misunderstand bond with Brenda and hold her hand chat away to her and saw how relaxed she was. My eyes welled up with emotion. She had shown Brenda a side to her not everyone can see, they spent two hours playing, talking and Ava and jack spent time with her, I spent the first hour shadowing her around the house chatting. I spent the second hour, washing, hanging out clothes and cooking dinner. In peace. Without  dealing with Mia screaming at me or arguing with ava or having to try split myself in five ways.i got to even sit out the back beside jack and play without constantly keeping an eye on Mia. Brenda was so gentle with her and let Ava and jack tagging along. It was great to have a calm house and people like Brenda help us out in more ways then ever possible. I got to give a full attention span to ,y other children. I got to see Mia get the attention she needed. Win win for everyone. It's a new thing to get used to and with time I know it will get even better

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